Part 1 Of Why I Have Been MIA

I was embarrassed and didn't want to talk about it but now I am...

A few weeks after being married we headed out on a family vacation, I was worried about leaving my job again for a week and stressed about it a lot but I also knew spending this time with my new family was really important.

I spent the week prior finishing all my projects and training the secretary on how to do the part of my job that she could. I worked hard that week trying to finish all the paperwork for every single employee so that we could finally get health benefits. I along with my coworker did over 20 interviews and found six solid new employees. I finished the design and orders for the new apparel. I set up lunch for our 80+ employees. And I set up an awesome system so that my coworkers would have an easier time getting through all the resumes and interviews for the week I was gone. All the while making sure to take down any absences, dealing with employee dissatisfaction and having to fire some employees.

All in all I ROCKED it and left feeling good about what I did.

On my way back I called to check into work to find out they had an awesome week finding new employees and getting stuff done while I was gone, so I was excited to get and join them.

When I got to work the next morning one of my bosses called me in to tell me that they were firing me, without explanation they told me to sign a piece of paper and to pack up my office.  On the paper I read I was being fired for insubordination.

Like a criminal they sent in someone to watch me pack up my stuff and make sure I wouldn’t steal anything.  After almost a year of taking the company credit card, buy gifts and gift cards for all our employees, never ONCE taking anything for myself and they had to watch me pack up my office?

I begged for some sort of clarity and the boss said he had overheard me complain about my work load and that I said I wouldn’t do my work. Mind you he “overheard” and because of that he didn’t hear correctly and just assumed that I meant I wouldn’t do my work.

I will admit that I had complained about my large work load with little pay but I worked for a startup and couldn’t expect much more. My understanding of insubordination would mean that I had blatantly had chosen to not to do my work, but clearly I had done it all before I left and if that truly was the issue they should have let me go before I left on vacation.

After weeks of anger and frustration at myself and completely failing on my interviews do to a lack of confidence in myself I received a phone call from my other boss checking in on me.

I couldn’t hold back my frustration and wondered why he was calling when I left the company on such a bad note. He then apologized unaware of the whole situation. Apparently their decision was solely based on the fact that they were able to get all the things done without me. All the policies and procedures I had put into place were working and it made sense to make a cut to lower their bottom line.

It had nothing to do with me. I was supposed to be laid off, not fired. Knowing the other boss well I concluded his reasoning for putting that I was fired instead of laid off was to avoid any unemployment situations. It is very easy to get unemployment when you have been laid off and then the companies insurance goes up.

Still frustrated I applied for unemployment out of spite and won. I only collected one week even though I was out for two months but I felt like I was wrong for pushing for it out of spite and not total necessity.

Business is business and I get why I was let go. If they could cut cost and still get the work done then I am fine with that.  What I will never be o.k with was how I was let go and how I was treated after I put my whole heart into the company. I really do wish them the best of luck in the endeavors and hope they find success. 

As of a few weeks ago I decided to go back to substitute teaching and I am loving it. Even though I am only in a class for a day or less I feel like I have a chance to make a difference in some kids life and hopefully excite them about education.

I may not officially be an Ironman Woman but I continue to be tested in more ways then I ever dreamt of in my life and am becoming an Ironman Woman mentally and hopefully physically. I am grateful for the hardships that are shaping me into the woman I want to be and hopefully I will actually learn from my mistakes, grow stronger, and be better.

Tune in next time for Part 2 of why I haven’t been blogging.